I don't... I don't know. He just seems to not care. [ Really insensitive.
Or maybe it's a guy thing to not care about first kisses?? ] But that's something you can't really change about a person, or maybe it's just his nature as a god. So there's nothing I can really do.
[ Aaah. The more she thinks about it, the more she's unsatisfied with what happened. She's beginning to grow upset. ] I just-- I w-want it back. I want my first kiss back. [ Because even if it was a mistake, it totally counts in her mind.
Maybe when she matures a little she'll see differently, but for now? Yeah, her eyes are watering. #teenageproblems ] Why did I have to bring those bottles? It's... it's all my fault.
[For as much as she's sympathized with the girl's plight so far, she can't say that she wouldn't have done the same thing. The only time that she'd been intoxicated with a man and attempted to kiss him, he'd refused and walked her home instead. Her standards have been bred a little high as a result. But that doesn't help her now, not when there's a girl crying on the other end of the line and all she wants to do is march up to Kid, take him by the ear and force him to promise to do whatever it takes to make this right.]
Listen - everyone makes mistakes and no man is worth crying over! You'll find someone who counts, and after that you'll never think back on this ever again.
[ She rubs the corner of her eyes, brushing away some of her tears, but they continue for now. ] I-I know... I know you're right. [ Although it's much less of her crying over someone and much more that it's her fault. Well, she knows now to definitely be more cautious. ] This-- this feeling won't last forever, you know? And I'll just b-be. Extra careful next time.
Mm, I know. [ She nods slowly. ] Th-thank you, too... I'm glad someone understands my feelings on this. [ And not having them brushed off as being nonsense or unimportant. ] It's nice to talk to someone.
[She frowns a little. A girl like her should have lots of friends in a place like this; it's an angry, easily irritated personality like Vanessa's that keeps people at arm's length.]
[ She has to think of that question for a moment. Well, it's not like she can't talk to anyone else. ] No, no, it's not that-- [ It's... more that she doesn't tend to, period, and keeps things to herself because she---. ] I just don't want to be a bother. Ah, that's why I was anonymous that one time.
[There's a quick, generic answer here. Something along the lines of "your friends will never think that you're a bother", but this is something that Vanessa had spent years learning. After Fred, Claude and Ernest died, she'd kept her own grief bottled up. Who had time for it when the rest of her family had suffered as well? There was nothing to do except be as strong willed as her older brothers and eventually as brave as her little brother. She really has no right to go around waving the banner of friendship at anyone.]
I figured it was because you didn't want him recognizing you and bothering you about it. [She finally says.] But...people probably don't see it that way. As a bother.
Ah... I've been told that before. [ She nods. ] I've also been told I'm too quick to make friends, so I didn't know what to do-- if it was alright to go to anyone or not...
...That's something I definitely can't help you with.
[She doesn't sound upset about it, though. Nightrays didn't have friends, they only had each other, and the few that had been allowed into her heart had all come to this place and left already.]
[It's a naive way to think about it, but it's also not altogether wrong. Encouraging it might make it worse, but at the same time, people who value friendship are hurt when they're told it's not reciprocated. Maybe some middle ground, then.]
Well...friends do talk and help one another through rough times...I suppose.
[ Her mood seems to brighten. Slowly, she IS learning that friendships aren't that easily made. But it's still nice to have someone to talk to. ] Then, you can come to me whenever you need help or support. Because that's what friends do.
[ Let's be real, Sanae would support or help someone who isn't her friend tbh. ]
[The words come out sounding distant, but not in a disrespectful, flippant way. Just unfamiliar, confused. No one offers Vanessa help and support these days; she's demands it when she can't deal with things on her own, and those moments are becoming few and far between.]
Well, I should get going. I have a lot to think about now. [ Also more self blame, more feeling bad, but...! She's glad she got to talk about it with Vanessa. That makes her happy. ]
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Or maybe it's a guy thing to not care about first kisses?? ] But that's something you can't really change about a person, or maybe it's just his nature as a god. So there's nothing I can really do.
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He can call himself a god all he wants, but there is something wrong with that guy.
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Maybe when she matures a little she'll see differently, but for now? Yeah, her eyes are watering. #teenageproblems ] Why did I have to bring those bottles? It's... it's all my fault.
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Listen - everyone makes mistakes and no man is worth crying over! You'll find someone who counts, and after that you'll never think back on this ever again.
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[It's a gentle but stern reminder. There are more important things in life than kissing boys.]
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You don't have anyone else to talk to here?
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I figured it was because you didn't want him recognizing you and bothering you about it. [She finally says.] But...people probably don't see it that way. As a bother.
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[ Then a frown. ] I have a lot to learn... I wish I knew how to make friends better.
/finally returns from vacation and work hello
[She doesn't sound upset about it, though. Nightrays didn't have friends, they only had each other, and the few that had been allowed into her heart had all come to this place and left already.]
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- You think of me as a friend?
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I know people tell me not to think others are friends so quickly... but you helped by talking to me. That's very friend-like, right?
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Well...friends do talk and help one another through rough times...I suppose.
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[ Let's be real, Sanae would support or help someone who isn't her friend tbh. ]
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[The words come out sounding distant, but not in a disrespectful, flippant way. Just unfamiliar, confused. No one offers Vanessa help and support these days; she's demands it when she can't deal with things on her own, and those moments are becoming few and far between.]
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Well, I should get going. I have a lot to think about now. [ Also more self blame, more feeling bad, but...! She's glad she got to talk about it with Vanessa. That makes her happy. ]
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Should it come down to it, I'll be glad to set him straight for you. Take care.
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[ She bows, and then the feed cuts. ]